Music licensing part 2 – DVDs and such

My previous post covered licensing for music when used in a live setting.  If you want to use music on a DVD that you produce for resale, it is a totally different system.

The good news is that any music that has been released commercially can be used by someone else.  All you have to do is pay for it.  It seems to be pretty straightforward, although I haven’t actually done it yet.  Here’s the web site with the information – Harry Fox Agency, HFA.  Go there and read up.

Basically, you pay a fee that is based on the number of different songs you use, the amount of each song you use (you don’t have to pay for the whole song if only use 20 seconds of it, for example) and the number of units you produce.

Convention part 3 – Education sessions

Continuing my series on thoughts from the Venthaven ConVENTion. Today’s edition is about education sessions I attended, otherwise known as lectures.

I could probably do a different post on each of the lectures I attended. Well, most of them.  I’ll only talk about those that inspired me to actually take notes.

• Ken Groves – I’ve heard Ken lecture a number of times. I also own his “Breaking Down the Brick Walls of Show Business” CD/book. Ken doesn’t pull punches. He gives his opinions clearly and loudly. Great stuff, too. Here are my key take-aways from Ken’s lecture:
  • Look good when you perform. Pay attention to what you wear. Be aware of what you’re standing in front of. Provide your own backdrop if you can.
  • During practice, have your figure out and just talk with him/her/it. Start in the corner of the room and comment about everything you see. Pick out small details. Don’t try to be funny, just talk. Be open to things that strike you as funny, or free associate with outside thoughts.
  • Say “no” more often. Turn down gigs that do not match what you do. Know what you need, what you do, be able to communicate that, and demand (gently) that you get it. You will gain more respect than by trying to acquiesce to everything the client thinks they want. (No, Ken did not actually use the word “acquiesce”…)
• Dale Brown – I always get something new every time I hear Dale speak. His lecture notes are always worth buying. This year was no exception. Topic was writing material.
  • “You must be funny. Otherwise you’re just a person with a doll.” That might be a slight paraphrasing, but you get the point.
  • Writing comedy is more about persistence and hard work than it is about being a witty person. It’s work!
  • Buy, read, and inwardly digest Gene Perret’s book, “Comedy Writing Step By Step”. He didn’t actually say that, but he did reference that book and the bulk of his lecture was similar in nature to what’s in that book. (I own it.) It looks like there is a new version out now, called, “The New Comedy Writing Step By Step”. Oooooh, big title change!
  • Write every day! Try to get one GOOD joke per day. Be aware that will require writing around a dozen bad ones.
• Pete Michaels – This was the first time I’ve gotten to catch Pete’s lecture. What I like most about Pete is his ability to put his characters way out there. They are bold and in your face. Don’t like that? Too bad! Key take-away? This quote. “You can’t please everybody, so you have to please yourself.” There’s a dirty joke in there somewhere, but the point is right on the mark. I struggle with this after having been in the corporate world for so long.

take a memo

I got a new toy yesterday. I am using it as I enter this blog post. It is Dragon Naturally Speaking. It is the coolest thing ever.

I have used dictation software before. Many years ago, when I was a software developer, I over did it with my hands. I was physically unable to type for a while. Dictation software allowed me to keep a job. But, I was no longer able to write software. It was that injury that initially pushed me into management. Those who can, do, those who can’t, manage. The technology at the time was not all that terrific and I returned to using a keyboard as soon as I was able. This latest version totally rocks!

The interesting test will be to see how it reacts to speaking in a ventriloquist voice.

Let’s give this a try:

• the boy bought the basketball
• many men make money
• if good fortune follows a fellow he’s fine
• values in veal and a venison
• please play the Piccolo

Hey, not bad. Those were dictated in my ventriloquist voice. Yes, I too, learned from Jimmy Nelson.

The really cool thing about this is the speed at which it is dictating. My first dictation system required a pause between each word. This system actually likes it better when you speak normally. This is way faster than typing.

Another feature that I look forward to trying with this is the ability to dictate voice memos on my Blackberry and transfer those directly using dictation software. Check back with me in about a week if you’re interested to know how that works.

Happy dictating!

Being on time

I tend to be late for things. Just today I was late for a doctor’s appointment. I’ve been this way for as long as I can remember. The main problem seems to be that I think it takes less time to get places than it really does. I never leave enough time to travel. And I’m constantly trying to get “just one more thing” done before moving on. When I worked the corporate job, I was notoriously late for meetings. Leaving my office at 1:59 for a 2:00 meeting didn’t work when it was an 8 minute walk across the facility. Fortunately for me, I was the boss, so people just had to wait for me. Well, except when it was my boss’ meeting I was attending.

Being late causes me stress. I don’t like stress and I don’t like being late. I prefer being early, getting settled, relaxing a few moments before whatever I’m going to begins.

Knowing this about myself, I make a huge effort to be on time for gigs. I use MapQuest and my portable GPS to help me plan. I’ve found the travel time estimates in MapQuest to be quite accurate for the way that I drive. My GPS is almost always overly conservative, sometimes saying a 3 hour trip will take 4 and 1/2 hours. It’s kind of fun to watch it adjust itself along the way as it figures out I’m traveling faster along the 2-lane roads than it thought I’d be able to do. When there is a discrepancy between the two, I tend to base my planning on the GPS to be on the safe side.  Sometimes, I split the difference.

As a side note on the use of a GPS, I always bring along a printed copy of the MapQuest directions as a backup. My GPS has gotten me to 95% of my gigs with little trouble, and has been especially helpful when traveling around in Amish country where the roads are small and not well marked.  It also saved me on a recent trip when I encountered a bridge that was out.  But, it is not without it’s warts. There are some random holes in its understanding of roads in Ohio.  These aren’t new roads either.  One minute all is fine and the next the GPS thinks I’m in the middle of a corn field. While I’m confident that following the GPS will always get me where I’m going, it doesn’t always pick the best route because of these holes.

Back to the issue of time…

By “on time”, I mean being there in plenty of time to set up all of the equipment, test the sound system, meet with the client, go over any last minute details, rearrange the seating if needed, etc. All of this before the guests arrive. For me, this means getting there at least an hour before the event begins. Most of my work is for corporate events, specifically dinners where I am the after-dinner entertainment. I usually arrive on site a full hour before the doors open. I like to get my equipment all set and the sound system fully checked out before the first guest walks into the room. If I am bringing my own lights, I add another half hour.

Often this means I’m standing around for 2-3 hours between the time I am “stage ready” and when I am introduced.  So be it.  I have learned to enjoy this time.  It is final prep time for me.  In my final meeting with the client before the event I gather pieces of information about the organization, some key people, etc.  At a recent event for a financial institution, I got a copy of the annual report they would be reviewing before my performance.  I then use this “down time” to do final cramming for the event and work on new bits specific to the event.  Corporate clients really appreciate it if you can include bits specific to them.

I still struggle with being on time, but I’m getting much better. The benefits to my stress levels and the resulting relaxed state this allows me to take to the stage are strong incentives for me.

Why so many characters?

An 11 year old boy came up to me after a performance full of questions. How did you learn to be a ventriloquist? When? Was it hard to learn? How many puppets do you have? After answering this last question, he asked, “Why do you have so many different puppets?” Ah, now that’s an interesting question…

There are a number of answers I could give. Things like, because I get bored easily, because I’m a sucker in the dealer room at the ventriloquist conventions, because I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up, because I can. But the real answer is… because every audience is different. And people within each audience are different.

Talk to anyone who has seen Jeff Dunham perform and ask them who is their favorite character. I guarantee you will get different answers from different people. And the preferences tend to be strong. There is not much waffling. Or ask people for their favorite character on Seinfeld. Different characters speak to different people.

After my shows I regularly ask people who was their favorite character. I typically use 3-7 different characters in a show. My current show includes Jose’, Curtis, Wilmer & Edna, Gus, and People Puppets (2 people from the audience whom I transform into puppets).

The first reaction when I ask the question is almost always the People Puppets. But, when I ask them which other character, the reaction is spread pretty evenly. I continue to be amazed by this. I will work an event full of hard working, dirty boot, greasy fingernail laborers. And they’ll love Jose’. Jose’ is as close to Sesame Street as I get. Go figure. Or I’ll go to an accounting firm, starched collars, tight ties and find Gus getting huge laughs. Gus is my gruff, beer drinking construction worker.

The only pattern I’ve seen so far is to identify one type of audience where Gus does not fit in – the country club set. People who would never consider fixing their own toilet simply cannot relate to him. But, a wild, crazy, bright orange furry thing with a Mexican accent? Universal.

This ability to utilize a variety of characters makes a ventriloquist unique in the world of stand-up comedy. A typical stand-up comic has one character. That character either works with the audience or it does not. But, a ventriloquist can more easily serve a broad, diverse audience by incorporating a range of characters.

I’ve learned to not sweat it if one character fails to elicit the usual raucous response on a given night. With each character I try to remain focused on the people who are enjoying that character. For those that aren’t, a tape in the back of my mind is playing, “Oh, you don’t like this one? That’s OK, you’ll like the next one.” Stay in the moment, play to the people who are enjoying it, don’t get distracted by those who are not. As each character plays to their fan base, those people come along for the ride with subsequent characters. By the end of the show, everyone is on board and having a good time.  Obviously, I like it best when people come on board early.  That’s why Jose’ is always first.

What brought this topic to mind was the latest newsletter from Darren LaCroix. He recently wrote about his experiences attending an Elton John concert where he noticed that different people reacted differently throughout the show to each song. It was an excellent message and reinforced my commitment to provide a variety in my shows. You can read more about Darren and sign up for his newsletter at his web site, http://www.humor411.com. I highly recommend it.

Business travel – part 2

Here are a few more travel patterns I’ve developed over the years that have helped me maintain my sanity.

Eat half & get dessert – Really. Most restaurant portions are way bigger than you really need, especially if you’ve been traveling on business and sitting in meetings all day. I love good food and I enjoy a tasty dessert. When the meal is brought out, cut it in half. Only eat up to the cut line. Then order dessert and do the same thing when it is delivered. For me, this allowed me to enjoy the meal and go back to the hotel feeling satisfied but not bloated. Many of us have that lingering voice in our heads screaming, “Think of the starving children in Africa.” Counter that thought with the realization that you did not get to choose the portion size. If someone else puts the food on your plate, you have no obligation to finish it all.

Treat hotel staff like people – We’ve all been there. By the time you get to the hotel you are spent, burnt out and tired. It is so easy to take out all of that frustration on the next person you run into, like the hotel desk clerk.  Remember, the person behind the counter when you check in is not the same person who cut you off in traffic, made that meeting go on too long, or the cause of any of the other minor annoyances you’ve encountered that day. They’re just a person doing their job. How much does it really cost you to paste on that smile one last time, speak to them politely and move on? I can’t count the number of times that little bit of politeness I have extended has gotten me into the last available room they were holding for someone else, upgraded me to a nicer room, or simply put a smile back onto the face of the equally tired and burned out person behind the counter.

Get to know the rental car lady – Here’s a fun story for you that shows the power of building relationships. In my corporate days I routinely traveled to the same airport and went to the same rental car agency. As a member of the “preferred renter” club, I would get dropped off at the car instead of needing to go into the building and stand in line. Sometimes my car would not be ready, so I would instead be dropped at the “preferred booth” where they would find me a car and send me on my way. Since I regularly flew in at the same time of day, the same woman was always behind that counter. I learned her name (a quick glance at her name tag) and started to say hello to her by name every trip. Even when my car was ready, I made a point of stepping into the booth, waving, and saying “hello” to her. In return, she came to know me by name and greeted me as well. As the weeks and months wore on, I noticed I was getting better and better cars even though I always rented “standard intermediate” vehicles. One chilly but sunny October day I happened to be assigned a convertible. I put the top down, bundled up my jacket, waved a big wave and drove on. She thought this was hilarious and started holding back convertibles for me every time she saw my name pop up in the reservations list. It got to where she would apologize if she didn’t’ have a convertible to offer me. All of this time I still only paid for a standard intermediate car.

Be nice, get to know people and enjoy the benefits.

Reciprocal taxes

Are you self-employed? Do you provide services in multiple locations? Hope you have a good accountant! Ah, the joys of reciprocal tax agreements.

Many people have run into this when moving from one state to another, or occasionally from one city to another.  But, as a service provider, this will be an annual thing for me to deal with. What am I talking about? Here’s the deal:

I live in the city of Upper Arlington in the state of Ohio. I dutifully pay my taxes to the city and to the state. But, what if I do a show in another location? Guess what! I am supposed to file a tax return for every community in which I perform! Without a good tax accountant, I would be lost.

Let’s say I do a show in Pennsylvania. PA expects me to submit a state tax return and pay them tax on the amount I earned for that show. Then I need to deduct that amount of income from my OH state tax return. OK, I was somewhat ready for this at the state level. But, it doesn’t stop there. My accountant tells me that most municipalities expect you to file local tax returns as well! So, not only do I need to file with Upper Arlington, I need to file with every little town where I did a show. When I was a regional act with only a few shows outside my local tax zone, this was a headache, but somehow manageable. Now that I am entertaining full time and traveling all over the country, this becomes a real mess of paperwork.  I expect to hit over 100 different municipalities this year.  That’s 100 local tax filings.  I’ve already been in 3 states outside Ohio, so that adds state filings, too.

Sure am glad I have an accountant to figure out which states and municipalities require this.

Big in Texas

I had another gig in Texas last week. I love playing events in Texas. They love me there! I’m not sure why my name pops up high on the search engines for event planners in the great state of Texas, but I’m happy to go there. It’s an easy flight from Columbus and the people are terrific. I’ve had several gigs there over the past few months and they’ve all gone exceptionally well. Plus, there’s no state income tax there, so it’s one less form to fill out at the end of the year.

Now an LLC

It is March as I write this, just back from spring break with my family. Something I decided while away was to start “doing the blog thing” on a more regular basis. I remembered I had created this place holder a while back, so let’s get it rolling.

There is much to talk about as to the status of my performing business. I’ll probably spread these across several posts. Too much for a single session.
In the fall I formalized the business, officially creating a Limited Liability Corporation. I am now the sole proprietor of I’m No Dummy Productions LLC. In theory, this should limit my liability should some terrible tragedy occur in the course of doing business. In these highly litigious times, we’ll have to see whether it provides any real protection. I hope I never have to find out.

I had a booming month of December on the performing front. As a corporate entertainer, that is by far the busiest month of the year. Many companies do their year-end banquets and need entertainment. I’m finding that business to be spreading into January and even February for what were traditionally Christmas parties. These are being transformed into more generic celebrations in the interest of political correctness. Rather than decide whether to call them Holiday Parties instead of Christmas parties, many companies are punting and moving away from the month of December. This is a good thing for me as it allows me to serve many more clients and spread the load across more months.

As I get going on this blog, I’d love to hear from you. What do you want to hear about? Performing? Ventriloquism? Comedy? Making the jump to self-employment? Faith? I expect to touch on all of these topics in upcoming posts.